Less than a month left

There are four weeks left of school, and I can see a change in my students. They are so animated all the time, very easily excited, and always wanting to play. It's a little more difficult to control them and hold their attention- they are ready for the summer! August 24-June 11 is a very long school year. It's hard for the teachers, too. I think the natural cycle of teaching is that by the end of the year, teachers are ready for the summer. However, I spend a great deal of time trying so hard to not wish the end of the school year away. Unlike most teachers, this is it for me. I will not be back in the fall, so although I am ready for the summer, I am also ultra-aware of the fact that this will be my last time with these children. I don't want to get too caught up in the excitement of going home.

The school year, for me, has been very successful. I remember how overwhelmed I was when I first arrived here in Honduras. The children could barely speak English, I didn't know how to control them, and the school offered little to no instruction on how to manage a classroom. But everything improved so much! The students and I became used to each other. I learned what to reasonably expect from seven-year-olds (although that's definitely something I'm still learning). I learned what's important to them and how to relate to them. My class is so advanced, too. They learn things so quickly. We are going to finish all of our curriculum early, and almost all of my students have good grades. This year has been incredible, and I am such a proud teacher.

As the end of the year approaches, I can't help but reflect back on my time here. There are some things I just really miss. I miss the fall. It was such a lovely time of the year. It was too cold for the bugs to be out, and everything was misty all the time. I loved when I first moved up to Villa Verde and pretty much lived with the four girls in the other house. It was really nice. They didn't have their front door then, and I felt like I was outside, even when I was technically in their house. Everything felt so fresh and new and touched by God. Everything felt spiritual to me, and I was so content with everyone and everything. I didn't want to be anywhere except where I was. It was a golden time, because things never stay like that. Novelty wears off and reality sets in, and things change. Our perceptions change.

Now everything is dry and hot. I feel gross because of all the starchy food I eat. I'm tired of washing my clothes on a pila and having to sleep with a tennis shoe in my bed so that I can kill the bugs that wake me up. I am sick of watching the neighbors yell at and hit their children. The girls up the mountain have a dog that bites and a big front door and I feel like I rarely see most of them anymore. A male American teacher moved up the mountain after Christmas, and that really did change things in many ways. It changed the dynamics on the mountain. The men here also caused some of the girls to change their behavior, and that changed our friendships. We also started to get internet at our house. For many reasons, things are just different now. Not necessarily in a bad way- but it is incredible how things can change. It doesn't feel like ten months have passed in Honduras. I can't help but think that I won't even realize everything I've been through until I'm out of this situation and can just look back on reflect on it. I feel like I've experienced and seen so much that life will just never be the same- it will be like BH and AH- before Honduras and after Honduras. There's more to say on this, but I'll save it for another day.